dial h for hire [video]

[unweave]

[ The feed picks up with a slight buzz of static. The visuals over the network focus on a waist-up shot of Aranea who isn't looking too hot. Not only is her face bruised (healing black eye, slightly swollen nose and busted lip), but there is a bandage pack poking out from under her top. ]

Don't want to waste anyone's time — there's enough stupid messages coming across this every day and I don't want to add to it.

My names Aranea Highwind and I'm recruiting for a mercenary group — odd jobs, monster hunts, personal protection, and the like. I'm willing to give a large cut on jobs I get in, bordering 65%. Tough sons of a bitches please apply and those looking for their problems to be solved? I'm your gal.

[ I mean, even now she's confident with a sly smirk plastered on her face. This is the most blunt ass sales pitch ever? But — ]

You can't trust everyone you meet here, some people will literally stab you. [ She nudges the view to her hip, but rolls her eyes as the camera gets back to her. ] But, there's still people wanting to help out. Why waste your time at that shitty fight club when you can make a difference and get paid for it? Think about it.

Comments

[unweave]

Sounds like you want some hero worship. Or fangirls.

[unpromising]

Now that you mention it...

[ Fangirls would be nice. . . they can all wear miniskirts. :'D ]

Guess I gotta work on that in the future.

[unweave]

Unreachable goals are always good motivators, I hear.

[ :') ]

[unpromising]

You think I'm so uncool... I had so many girls asking for number back home.

[ Because they were his students. And they wanted to ask him things about class. . . ]

[unweave]

Nah, not that. I just don't give guys boosts to their egos. Mediocre men with ambition can be the most deadly of all.

[ She doesn't...compliment many people, really. So! ]

[unpromising]

Fair enough.

[ Credit where credit is due! ]

I don't crave acceptance and praise, anyway.

[unweave]

Those are always good from time to time, though.

[unpromising]

Can't see why it'd be good, in my case.

[ crawwwwling iiin my skiiiin ]

[unweave]

Awww, what's wrong, pretty boy? In a brooding mood?

[unpromising]

Yeah. You might wanna get used to it.

[unweave]

Jeez. Don't be a buzzkill. I was just starting to like you.

[unpromising]

What? I'm not fun if I write poetry?

[ He clears his throat, then begins... ]

What have you wrought? A smothering indistinctness of agony as perceptions twist. Once we experienced bliss, glad-hearted and hand in hand, but your heart soured.

[unweave]

Eh. Eight out of ten. You had me on bliss, but lost me on the cliche heart sour line.

[unpromising]

I had to think of that just five seconds ago.

[unweave]

I stand by what I said. [ SORRY... ]

[unpromising]

Fair. I wasn't asking for a 10, anyway.

[unweave]

We'll give you a 10 for something one day. I'm hopeful.

[unpromising]

Your words of encouragement fill my heart with glee.

[unweave]

It's what I'm here for.