text » un: killjoy

[motivation]

the hells is this and why was it on my doorstep? [ IMAGE ATTACHED ]

if anyone's up for a spar, i could use the exercise

[ never mind that she earns her keep around here by regularly competing in one of the fight clubs... alvis is gone again which means dutch needs the distraction ]

Comments

[motivation]

to the drink, sure

[sheriffing]

I'm pretty sure that's the point. Whoever left it on your doorstep thinks you're in need of an pet.
And they know you wouldn't have agreed to it if they'd asked.

[motivation]

whoever left it on my doorstep needs to mind their own business

[sheriffing]

I'm guessing they probably know that.
It's... kind of cute? Could be worse.

[motivation]

you seem to know an awful lot about whoever left it

[sheriffing]

Honestly? I'm just making a lot of assumptions based on knowing a lot of people who've acted with good intentions.

[motivation]

that's a big assumption to make

[sheriffing]

Not really. Animals are supposedly good for companionship.

[motivation]

[ it's a big assumption to make about people. to assume they have good intentions. in dutch's experience, that is rarely true. but she's not going to offer more than she already has, reveal more. ]

sure, whatever

[sheriffing]

I didn't do it, if that's what you're asking. I'm only about 70% sure I know what that little guy is and I don't go handing pets off to strangers.

[motivation]

smart of you
what do you think it is?

[sheriffing]

A kinkajou.
Am I right? Did it come with a manual?

[motivation]

no clue, it didn't
the hells is a kinkajou

[sheriffing]

I'd try asking around to see if they're popular in this world.
I think they climb things? Might help to give him something to do.

In my world, they were the kinds of creatures I'd only see in my son's animal reports.

[motivation]

right
what's an animal report

[sheriffing]

A kids' research project.
Cute animals that climb were pretty popular with twelve year-olds.

[motivation]

sounds fun

[ sounds like... childhood. what the hells. ]

[sheriffing]

It's kids' stuff.

[ just don't ask her how much she misses that kid and his stuff.]

Kinkajous, sloths, meerkats.

[motivation]

never heard of any of those