AUDIO POST.

[emori]

[A woman's voice, it seems. Confident and maybe a little smart-assy. There's five seconds of silence before the audio post starts.]

What's with the beeping? Does it normally do that? I was told it's a distress call. Shouldn't we do something?

Comments

[mofi]

Kidnapped, tortured and killed. Sounds like a lot of fun. When are we going again?

[emori]

Feel real good right now, don't you, John?

[mofi]

A little bit, yeah.

[emori]

Enjoying my mistakes. Nice one.

[mofi]

Oh, you'd be gloating too. Don't act like you wouldn't.

[emori]

I wouldn't because I respect you. Or did.

[mofi]

Okay, I'm not really gloating. But I was right to be worried about you going out there. I was right about this not being a survivor's move.

[emori]

I'm fucking sick of hearing about surviving.

[mofi]

[ Woah, there. Language, Emori. ] What did you think this was some vacation?

[emori]

No, John. I just don't want to hear you tell me one more time about how you're a survivor. What do you think I am? I was abandoned as a baby. My brother took care of me and he was barely old enough to wipe his own ass.

[mofi]

We're survivors. Not just me. Don't put words in my mouth. I never said you were anything less. But this was a stupid move and you should have known better.

[emori]

Excuse me for being a human being.

[smithandwesson]

... I am still here you know.

Nice backstory though.

[Maybe he should get some popcorn.]

[smithandwesson]

.... Oy. Who the hell are you?

[You're ruining his perfectly good exposition here.

Rude.]

[mofi]

who wants to know?

[ And who the hell are you, buddy? ]

[smithandwesson]

The guy who's conversation you just interrupted, that's who.

[I'm not your 'buddy' friend.]

[mofi]

did i hurt your feelings?

[smithandwesson]

Oh yeah. I'm bawling. Fucking rolling on the floor here with tears down my face.

[He says in the most deadpan voice ever.]

Must make you feel pretty damn good about yourself.

switches to audio

[mofi]

I was having a conversation with my girlfriend. [ Murphy wishes. ]

I'm not sorry her attention went elsewhere for a moment. By all means, continue your significant conversation. I'll be quiet.

[smithandwesson]

Yeah, thanks for that by the way. I was always looking forward to a day when I could awkwardly be forced to look in on someones painfully strained relationship status.

You sound like a stand-up boyfriend by the way.

[mofi]

[ How dare! Murphy is very sensitive about his relationship with Emori! The one he single-handedly fucked up because self-sabotage. ]

No one forced you to do anything, pal.

Thank you, I appreciate the compliment. [ Dickhead. ]

[smithandwesson]

I was being sarcastic.

Look, if you really respect her maybe the first thing you shouldn't do is jump into her conversation with other people only to point your finger at her and tell her how wrong she is.

I mean, you're right, but even I know a dick move when I see one.

[mofi]

No shit. So was I. [ Murphy really isn't good at talking to people and he's terrible at making friends. ]

I'm going to jump into any conversation where she is talking about putting herself in danger. Call it a dick move all you want.

[smithandwesson]

[Pot meet kettle. It's not as if Sanzo was the spokesman for civility.]

She was already being talked out of it you dumbass. All your input did was make you look like a dick to the girl you're trying way too hard to impress.

JOHN

[emori]

This is such a display and all, but could you stop? For me?