elnysa | text | un: rjlupin

A few of us have been talking and we're already tired of being broke, so we're wondering what everyone hopes to do here job-wise, what you did before, and how you go about explaining it to the locals if they want to know about your previous floor-sweeping or shelf-stocking experience before allowing you to sweep any floors or stock any shelves. Especially if your job back home was a little more complicated than that.

And have any of them asked any of you for references? Do they actually check them?

Does anybody have any experience with making up false references wholecloth? Can we begin acting as one another’s references?--which is a terribly trust based suggestion, we realise, and so the following question,

Should we design a character test for the sake of honest false reference corroboration? (‘We’ is the general ‘we’ not the ‘we’ asking these questions.) Is there anyone here who is not a reliable hard worker that the rest of us should be sure not to refer for anything?

Before anyone feels the need to point out that unreliable lazy workers will lie: yes, thank you, please see similar discussions following the questions about murder.

[ For the record, this is the product of a phone and its tiny keyboard being passed around among several different curious people. Remus just drew the short straw, because there is no justice in any world, and has to post it. Also, threadjacking super encouraged if you feel the urge. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[He's a bit confused by the different username answering him, but he continues the conversation anyway.]

Former assassin, thank you.

Besides, I've never been a good liar.

seriously? how does that work? anybody asks you just tell them you're a hitman?

Until recently, we've been careful enough to stay in the shadows. There's been no need to answer such a question.

That all changed before I arrived here, but it's a story for another time.

so are you going to keep being an assassin here or are you hoping those are what social workers like to call marketable job skills

I have no intention of returning to that path, so it appears I might have to start fresh.

I suppose I will see if I possess these marketable skills.

so what are you going to do instead?

I'm not sure. I suppose I'll have to earn their trust and show that I'm more than an assassin.

[He never thought he'd actually come to that point in his life.]

you think telling a bunch of strangers you kill people for a living is going to make them trust you?

have you considered just learning to lie already

[Of course when she puts it that way it sounds horrible.]

I don't know if I can learn. I was trained to when I was younger but I was terrible at it.

Still, I would rather be up front as opposed to them finding out later on.

Perhaps you could say you killed something other than people, like bears, or rats.

[ Helping! ]

I don't think I could even bring myself to say that. I never once killed any kind of animal.

Really? Not even a spider?

Spiders have never wronged me, at least not the ones from my world.

[That mind spider however, was a monster and needed to be eliminated.]

What about flies? Ever slap one?

I've shooed them away, but we had staff who took care of those sorts of things.

So you're cool with killing people and telling people that you killed people, but killing a fly is a bridge too far

are you secretly a spider? maybe like half spider? any other kind of animal?

[~~with a name like Venom and all~~]

I'm not a spider, nor am I half-spider or any kind of animal like that.

I don't like the idea of killing something for the sole reason of being bothered by it. It feels pointless.

So if I paid you to kill spiders you'd do it, just not for free?

Why would you hire me to kill spiders? Are there some that are troubling you?

[Those must be some really evil spiders. ~~if they came from the forest he'd understand~~]

It's a hypothetical, dude. Do you always ask your assassin customers questions?

It would be bad business if I didn't get the proper information. And I've never been asked to eliminate spiders before.

[new business: assassin pest control]

So for real assassin jobs you ask why they want the person dead? Do you sometimes refuse if you don't like their reasons? That seems like it'd be bad for business too

We've turned jobs away before for various reasons. We were more interested in removing those who were a detriment to society.

There is more, but I'd rather not bore you with the details.

Who's we?

The Assassin's Guild. It's my former organisation.

(no subject)

barreling - 2017-08-29 16:58 (UTC) - Expand

poolhall_killer - 2017-08-30 02:16 (UTC) - Expand

barreling - 2017-08-30 04:39 (UTC) - Expand

poolhall_killer - 2017-09-01 00:06 (UTC) - Expand