[text] un: 🎂 Linneus

[inaurare]

First, I fear I have been remiss in extending my gratitude to all those who helped in the rescue of myself and others, as well as those of you who have kindly given your time and assistance in the aftermath of the… difficulties we were involved in. I hope you will accept my thanks.

I think perhaps many of you may be aware of the gift and invitation sent to some of us as there has been some discussion over this forum. I was curious, if anyone might care to answer - to how many of us has this overture been made? How many of us were sent no courier?

I was tempted to drive mine from my doorstep, I must confess.

[but that is more healthy caution than outrage at what the poor man was bearing.

The next is worded and re-worded. It is strange to post in writing at all, like writing a letter to the world, and he tries to put the next as softly as he can]

There has been talk of the trinkets some of us received and I can’t help but wonder if they might be meant to… mark us out, so to speak. I have encountered such before, albeit by different means, and I have heard tale of Olympians marking outsiders, too. Perhaps someone might share their opinions? Am I looking too far into this?



Finally, if someone would tell me how to remove the cake from next to my name, I would be very appreciative.

Comments

[inaurare]

So did I; the gentleman was very insistent. And while I appreciate the gesture I'm not so sure about the attention.

[or for that matter about people at all, right now. He used to enjoy the bustle of the crowds, of the marketplace, but being flanked by strangers right now makes him want to run and hide. Makes him feel like he is about to be snatched again.]

It is, and thank you. [a hesitation, before he follows up-] I tend not to publicise it.

[for professional reasons. Of course there were gifts, small celebrations around a cake in the kitchen that he blushingly allowed. But that was private. After all, it was not necessarily good for his guests to be able to work out how old he was.]

[gekkajuu]

[That is one thing they don't have in common, then: Atsushi doesn't fear strangers or crowds. Or perhaps it would be more accurate to say he fears everybody and nobody all at once. He wants to keep living, ideally, but his life has so little value that he wouldn't be surprised or shocked at losing it. He's far more worried about everyone else.]

Why not? It's a good reason for a celebration.

[inaurare]

[crowds aren't good - there are too many people to be wary of. Being alone isn't much better, but he's getting there]

I suppose it wasn't so much that a grew out of it as that I sort of stopped and never started again.

But I would rather celebrate other people's.

[gekkajuu]

Then think of it as celebrating everyone who shares a birthday with you.

Even if it's just getting something nice to eat, I think we all deserve something nice right about now.

[inaurare]

That's an interesting way to look at it. And you're not wrong, I suppose.

Have you been well, Atsushi?

[gekkajuu]

I have.

I wasn't for a while, but I'm doing better now.

Getting that brooch... I guess you went through more or less the same as I did.

[inaurare]

A difficult event an extended stay in the Sanctuary to recover? I think that was many of us, yes... but I am glad that you are doing better.

[it reassures him to see there getting better; helps him feel a little more strength in himself with the knowledge that others are managing]

[gekkajuu]

[It takes a while for the reply to come. Atsushi doesn't want to scare people off the Sanctuary for no reason, but not talking about what happened seems unfair.]

I didn't go there. I was held there.

How have you been holding up?

[inaurare]

I'm sorry.

[he was aware of this disturbing fact a little later, once the scope of the situation was explained. It niggled at him all throughout his rest]

I hate that I worked there and had no idea something might happen.

I ended up having some... restorative healing done, just that I might manage day to day.

[he was stubborn at first, vocal in his reasons an excuses, but it was kind of difficult do things when every movement felt like it cracked his still-healing skin; hurt his hands with no fingernails to protect them. Though there is no need to go into details. Everyone has their own lingering scars]

That being said, I am mending yet. In more ways than one.

[gekkajuu]

You weren't the only one.

[Atsushi is thinking of Dylas in particular: poor Dylas, who had worked there and then was held there... and then almost died there. Atsushi had gotten off easy by comparison.]

If it's physical, I can probably heal you! The rest could be a little harder.

[inaurare]

Your offer is very kind but in honesty I was resistant initially, too. I am no doctor for my concerns to carry much weight, but do worry for the consequences of letting one's body heal ahead of its natural pace, especially after one had taken a mental blow, too.

But this also is due to me knowing my own nature well enough that I am less likely to be patient with myself without some sort of reminder.

I realise... that this perhaps makes me sound a glutton for punishment.

[he could save himself a lot of discomfort, that is certain, but if he burns himself out mentally, emotionally, too...? Linneus knows well enough his own tendency to project a facade, to try to make others believe that everything is all right, and that he could well break himself that way, after already treading that fine line in his youth. He can't take that kind of risk when he has no one he sees regularly enough who might help him, no one to police his behaviours but himself.]

[gekkajuu]

No, I think I understand.

[More or less. Would it have been the same for Atsushi, he wonders? He's not sure the physical damage would have fully healed, though - and Dylas' death had been more or a blow than being captured and suffering hypnosis and its consequences all those days.]

Still, the offer stands, if you ever run into trouble again.

[... That sounds so much more omnious than he'd intended it.]

Even if it's just a stubbed toe!

[He really shouldn't be allowed to joke.]

[inaurare]

I shall be taking care that I do no such thing.

[the very idea makes him cringe. They say he should have no trouble with his nails anymore but he still has nightmares...]

But I shall let you know, of course.

[gekkajuu]

Sorry, I brought back such unpleasant memories on your birthday.

[inaurare]

I know it is little comfort my saying so, but I do promise that that... is hardly a difficult feat at the moment.

[if Atsushi hadn't, something else would. It's not his fault]

Don't feel bad.

[gekkajuu]

[Atsushi does feel bad. But he'll live.]

Where did you live again? I want to send you something small for your birthday!

[inaurare]

Oh, you needn't do that! Really, it's all right.

[he... is really bad at receiving gifts. And he wouldn't have let anyone know today was his birthday, if he could have helped it...]

[gekkajuu]

[TOO BAD the truth is out there!!]

I insist! It won't be anything fancy this short term, but you deserve a gesture if nothing else.

[inaurare]

[people are not supposed to know he does something as pedestrian as GETTING OLD. But at least Atsushi is making Linneus laugh, even if it's not possible to tell over this device]

I shall push you off my doorstep as I almost did that courier!

[gekkajuu]

[Then get old in style and do it... riding a bike?? Something like that. It seems to suit a midlife crisis.]

Then I will climb in through your window!

[Thank you, Diva, for that brilliant idea. In all seriousness, though:]

At least come to dinner? Now is a better time than ever before to celebrate that we've lived another year.

[inaurare]

The windows are locked, but I most heartily wish you luck.

[hesitating over the dinner invite. That... would mean stepping outside, on which he is conflicted]

Ah, but what if this should be a trap?

[gekkajuu]

It's not a trap!

Unless you consider eating to be torture, then yes, it's a horrible trap that I will spring on you.

[Made especially effective by the fact that he's being honest about his intentions.]

[inaurare]

I am not sure it is a trap if you tell me it is one.

[gekkajuu]

Maybe that's the sneakiest part of the trap!

[inaurare]

But that would be unfair. You wouldn't be unfair to a friend.