TEXT | un: nightray

[yelliot]

_{[After about half an hour of trying to figure out how to post with his phone, Elliot's using the network for the first time. Does he have something important to report? Well, that depends on if cats matter to you or not...]}

My friend found a cat.

_{[Ah yes, the classic 'asking for a friend technique' in action. Always works, never fails.]}

They don't know what to name it, so I'm asking for suggestions. This is what it looks like.

Don't suggest stupid names either! A cat like this deserves a really good name!

Comments

[catfident]

forest, fox, saffron

a plant, animal, and spice respectively

[yelliot]

I don't know anyone with those names.

But I see what you mean.

Still, I'm not naming her dog.

[catfident]

[ don't be such a party pooper, elliot ]

then what?

[yelliot]

Maybe Nessy.

i hope that's short for vanessa

[catfident]

like the monster?

you bet it is

[yelliot]

What? No! It's short for Vanessa!

good

[catfident]

who's that



your girlfriend?

[ not even close ]

[yelliot]

No gross! My sister!

[catfident]

[ oh. that's boring ]

what's so gross about naming a cat after a girl? people do it all the time

[yelliot]

Yeah but my sister isn't my girlfriend.

[catfident]

does that mean you don't have a girlfriend

[yelliot]

Why would I have a girlfriend?

[catfident]

[ that's fair, she doesn't know if this is a guy or a girl ]

does that mean you have a boyfriend instead

[yelliot]

I think so...
Yes?

[catfident]

so then why not name the cat after your boyfriend

[yelliot]

Because it's a girl cat.

[catfident]

you can give females male names


you realize that right

[yelliot]

...Yes.

[catfident]

[ alright, she'll quit it now. leave him to his marital dispute with his new boyfriend. ]

good luck with nessy then

don't let her get fat

[yelliot]

I won't?! I'll be good to her!

action;

[flips]

[ and after elliot sends the text, a book flies across the room and smacks him in the head. ]

[yelliot]

_{[Cue screaming.]}

OW! LEO?! WHAT THE HELL?

[flips]

"Boyfriend"?

[yelliot]

Huh? What are you talking about?

_{[Wait a moment.]}

...Were you reading my cat post?

[flips]

[ yes ]

Did you mean me?