TEXT 🕷

[webdesigned]

un: spiderguy

( the username might not be familiar to most, since it isn't used often and usually only with those that already know about who spider-man is. these are unusual circumstances, though, and require a little flexibility. )

yo, spider-man here

( absolutely just ... puts that out there, like it's a perfectly normal name that no one should have questions about. )

usually this sort of thing isn't a team sport for me, but, hey. old spiders can apparently learn new tricks. or try? this is me, trying.

so i here i am on a midnight stroll at flona cove, i love me some romantic walks alone on the beach,
and to my astonishment just offshore there are what look like pirates (a few hats w feathers but what gave them away was the guy with the eye patch) making off like... well, pirates? i guess? with caches i know for a fact they didn't dig up
there's lots of these guys. 30 or more. and while i'm used to the solo thing, maybe this is more like a 2 person job.
3. maybe 3.

any takers? and more importantly, how fast can you get here

( he will take questions and concerns while he's at it. shoot. text only though, please... he's trying to go incognito. )

Comments

[braidedwonder]

Not really sure. I usually deal with space pirates and they prefer beam canons or just flat out ramming in to you.

I mean.. sounds like a cake walk with the right lighting and the right rifle.

Probably not as action-y as some people would like though, that way.

[webdesigned]

oh, yeah. no beam canons spotted thus far. not that I know what that is, but, guessing.

they seem easy enough to wrangle up, even without rifles and perfect lighting. maybe I should have specified I am looking for non-lethal help on this one.

( this one and everything he does ever, but shh. )

[braidedwonder]

I mean I'm pretty sure you'd know even if you've never seen one and those guys.. kinda seem like the like. Story book kind of pirates.

Unless they're hiding something which would be smart as hell.

Who says they had to be used lethally, anyways?

I'm pretty good at sneaking but idk if the juice is worth the squeeze if we don't even know what they got, you know?

[webdesigned]

guess it depends on what kind of rifle you are using, though I am hoping to round them up without hurting them too bad...

I can't promise you any payment beyond the satisfaction of a job well done and the potential gratitude of miners. and the miners are kinda crotchety, so, no promises on that last one.

[braidedwonder]

Sounds like a raw deal if I'm honest. Especially if you don't know what you're walking in to.

Might wanna sweeten that deal to get some people into it, you know?

[webdesigned]

it is a bit of a raw deal. definitely agree on that one.

( he's paid some steep prices for interjecting himself into situations that he could very well ignore. yet every time he tries to stop, Peter always regrets it. )

the only incentive I've got is that it's the right thing to do. if that's not enough, I get it.

[braidedwonder]

You know if there's anything I learned in the past year or two, it's that the whole 'what's right' thing is a big old scale of shades of grey.

So, nah, I'm good. Thanks for the attempt though!

[webdesigned]

i see a lot more gray than black and white these days too. but as far as im concerned, if you see something and it feels wrong that's probably because it is. and if you can do something about it, you should.

but, of course, that's just me. there's a reason i'm used to fighting solo. i know it isn't like that for everyone.

[braidedwonder]

Tried that one. Ended up in military jails a few times and let me tell you what's not fun : anything involved in a military jail.

[webdesigned]

anything jail related doesn't sound like it'd be enjoyable, to be fair, but it is also hard to make jail sound worse than throwing military in front of it.

i mean there's probably ways, but, not that many.

[braidedwonder]

Does it being on the moon make it worse?

[webdesigned]

is this a trick question

( he's never been on the moon. that sounds kinda cool so he wants to say better.... but that's probably not what this guy is looking for. )

[braidedwonder]

Nah it's legit. I was legit born on a space colony and legit once held in a military moon prison.

Sounds like a cool adventure until you're there, trust me.

[webdesigned]

okay, I will trust you

I may be spider-man but my world was just earth. until I ended up here, anyway. space was a barely ventured frontier.

[braidedwonder]

Okay 'spider-man' - [ If only peter could hear the sarcasm with which Duo would say the name IRL, but then again, this is a kid who grew up with no concept of super heroes and all of that. Also ended up piloting a massive mech, but that's a story for another day - ]

- there's a lot of you who've never been off Earth around here. I bet space is a bit of a wild ass ride.

[webdesigned]

( use as much sarcasm as you want........ to be honest Peter uses a bit of it himself when it comes to his moniker. )

That is almost putting it mildly. Especially considering landing was basically just a mass ejection and we hit the planet full force in tiny pods.

It was not fun, let me tell you.

[braidedwonder]

Oh so you came at the same time as Prompto then.

I just kinda woke up and went on my way, no drama, no whatever so I guess it's not quite as bad. Been through enough rough re-entries to not be jealous of that kind of welcome, too, though.

[webdesigned]

anyone that is jealous has probably never experienced it before

it may sound cool to hurtle from space but in execution, I did not enjoy, and would leave a negative rating on yelp if it existed here.

[braidedwonder]

Re-entry ain't that bad. I got sick the first time I went to Earth but after that it got to be old hat.

What's yelp, though?

[webdesigned]

i hope that was a proper re-entry and not a crash landing, i assume there is a difference between the two

yelp is ... an online review website for businesses?? its a funnier joke when you know what it is

[braidedwonder]

Yeah, proper re-entry. The gravity still gets to you regardless.. Being on Earth the first time kinda hurt, actually, because the gravity on the colonies is a little bit less than what Earth's got.

Sounds useful. Like it would've saved me a good few less than stellar meals while I was hangin' out.

[webdesigned]

......huh. i wonder if the gravity here is that comparable to earth, relatedly. honestly never thought about how it could be different but you're right and it could be.

yeah, it was. feel free to make the nysa version of yelp and make out like a bandit.

[braidedwonder]

Doesn't feel much different to me. Still prefer the weightlessness of space though tbh... It's like a boob for a baby for me.

Man I really should. Could probably do it in a few hours!

[webdesigned]

wow. that is quite the metaphor.

( that is all he's got on that one, duo... an interesting correlation to say the least. )

go forth and prosper. you have my blessing.

[braidedwonder]

I mean I was born out there from a test tube so... in the blood is saying too little.

How bad would it be if I made a requirement that all comments had to be at least a little funny?

I hate flat out bitching for the sake of it.