elnysa | video; un: eproghuefgdzptrrw

[ Byerly, a handsome fellow with a hard-to-place accent that just sounds a bit different, is lounging on a couch. The angle isn't entirely flattering, since he's filming himself while laying supine, and so there's a view sort of halfway up his nostrils that is a little bit too much information. A bottle of brandy dangles from one hand, and his voice is slurring just a bit. This fellow seems quite drunk. ]

Bonsoir, you grunting peasants and cultureless rubes, and happy Winterfair to all. For those of you who are cultureless monsters, Winterfair is a time when gifts are exchanged and joy is had. My gift to you is that I won't call any of you peasants again for the duration of this broadcast. Winterfair was also the last Emperor's birthday, or thereabouts, which meant everyone had to give him their taxes for the year, but mine's not till later, so you don't need to pay me till then. I'll let you know when taxes are due. Start saving up now.

So what should you all give me instead? I suppose to begin with you could entertain me. What do you say, my cream puffs - a little game of two truths and a lie? You know the rules, since the rules are literally the name of the game. Go on, play with me, do. I'll start. I'm currently rightful Emperor of Barrayar, my great grandfather Pierre once showed up to a Winterfair ball soaked in blood to send a message, I'm terrible in bed.

Anyone who opts out of the game, I'm going to assume they're simply too in love with me to speak with me, so don't play at your own risk.

[ He winks, and then lifts the brandy to his mouth - and it apparently goes down at a bad angle, because he sits up, coughing and spluttering and getting alcohol down his front before he shuts off the feed. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ she rolls her eyes, but she's clearly amused. ] That's a common misconception. We're actually known for always being correct.

Really? [ He purses his lips. ] Sounds like I should offer a more difficult two-truths-and-a-lie, then, to put that to the test.

Excellent. Challenge me.

Hm -

[ He taps his chin, and offers a deeply absurd and unfair: ]

My great-great-great grandfather was Roman Vorparadis, my great-grandmother was Petra Vorkovacs, my great-uncle was Dono Vorrutyer.

[ And an innocent blink at her. No one of those statements came across more or less honest-sounding than any other. ]

[ rude, tbh. Cheryl looks momentarily cross and gives him the kind of Look that all seventeen year old girls have mastered. ]

Those aren't very amusing facts.

[ And he shoots her the smirk innate to every big brother who's ever spent his time tormenting a younger sister. ]

The point is not to amuse. The point is to test infallibility.

[ fine then. she has clearly set herself up for failure. still, she pushes on with her usual full confidence. ]

Your great-grandmother wasn't Petra Vorkovacs.

[ it's a guess, obviously, but she sounds confident. ]

[ Clearly pleased: ]

Sorry, dear girl. Maman was a Vorkovacs before she was a Vorrutyer.

[ boo. ]

Being on an alien planet must be interfering with my usual strengths.

Hm. Well, by my count, it's now your turn once again.

I'm not going to go easy on you. [ fair's fair. ]

Our house was named Thornhill. My mother's name is Rose. Our family motto is Radices Currere Abyssi.