elnysa | (no subject)

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So many here tell of their closeness to their siblings, to the great joy that their siblings bring them. I could not agree more with such sentiment, for the richness that my own bring me has always far outweighed any great burden they've put on me (and some have put burden upon me indeed!).

But, in that great sentiment, I must say that I have put off announcing my own brother has indeed left, and so any friend he may have had here, I ask you make yourself known to me. My brother is Edmund Pevensie, and I should like to thank you, and ask you be my friend too.

And, if you did not know him, I would say, then meet me for my own sake. I am long in introducing myself, and I feel quite badly for the delay. I am Lucy Pevensie, and most grateful to make your acquaintance.

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I am not uneasy.

But I would like to give us some distance.

[Because that's important.]

Because I think if you do not wish to court that is one thing.

[He wasn't fond of the idea, but knew that it was probably the smart thing to do, something that he never really followed in his life.]

Lucy, I do... [He does feel something for her, he wants to say.] I don't want to hurt you.

[But he didn't want to lose her friendship either.]

I did not think you ever did.

[She knows better than that.]

[But he made mistakes in keeping his feelings and thoughts to himself, as he always had before.]

We are forced to wait in this world for the people we care about to wake up. Until they do, we don't know what will happen.

I don't share what I feel very often. I have lost so many, it's easier to keep it to myself.

Yes. So.

[Her lips are pressing together, in a firm line.]

You do not have to wish to court me, Jon. That is simple enough a thing.

[She's mad at him, he can tell that much.]

It's not that.

[He's attracted to her and had tried to make that clear, but that was the problem.]

There is someone I'm waiting for.

[There's a very pregnant pause.]

Did you think it was funny?

Why do men always think it's okay-

[She's starting to cry, and she's furious, and embarrassed.]

You made a mockery of me.

I didn't mean for that.

[He isn't sure what he could have done differently, but that was a continual question for him related to all of his choices.

He is careful not to step into her space. Instead, he met her eyes and accepted her anger with an apologetic expression.]

I never meant to hurt you.

No, but you did not think at all!

Of me, of someone else who you are waiting for-

[The tears are coming faster but she's keeping herself together. Somehow.]

That was a most unkind thing you did.

[He frowns, not wanting to make the situation worse but feeling frustrated at them both.]

I never went past my honor.

[He's certain of that.]

Unkind? What would you have me do?

I would caution you to not raise your voice at me, sir.

[She really is crying.]

Honor is not the mark of a good man, only a man who has decided the basest rules are sufficient.

I am not trying to argue with you.

[And to try to prove that point, he is intentionally keeping his voice soft.]

You really think that about me?

I think you should have said something sooner.

I think you should have said so I could untangle my heart.

I should have, aye.

But I didn't know what you felt until the lake.

You threw me in. Without thinking that it might send an impression.

Why would you do such a thing?

I don't know.

[He had suspicions but it seemed like a bad idea to simply blame the environment.]

There was something strange about that day.

[She shakes her head.]

You must excuse me.

[She means she wants to leave.]

[He nodded, taking a step back.]

I'm sorry.

Yes. As am I.

[He waited until she was out of sight before he started to make his way back to the Stark home, his head heavy with thoughts and guilt.]

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