Audio | un: anonymous

[meinwaifu]

[The poster on the network today is listed as anonymous -- but for anyone who has met him in person, they'll be sure to recognize his voice. He's not making an attempt at keeping a secret so much as making sure his name only goes out to those he wants it to. He's going by more than one these days, after all.]

[If someone listens carefully, they'll hear the sound of fire crackling in the background. Is he sitting by a campfire? Strange, it seems a little early in the day for that.]

I do hope everyone is having a lovely morning! Or at the very least, I hope you're all fairing better than I am at the moment. You see, I'm having something of a demon problem, and was wondering if anyone might be able to assist me in taking care of it! Naturally, I wouldn't be asking for anyone to help me for free.

[Something shatters in the background, and there's a good minute or two of silence. When he returns, his voice is as calm and unflappable as before... but it's probably good no one can see the face he's making.]

I'm currently in need of a large amount of holy water, but I'm afraid I'm rather incapable of producing it myself. I already know the proper rituals of course, but typically only someone of a certain caliber of purity or faith is capable of imbuing the water with the right properties. [And, ya know, not being a demon helps.] If there are any holy men, priests, priestesses, monks... ah, or even someone of particularly devout faith of any sort who would be willing to assist me, I'd be more than happy to return the favor in whatever way you see fit! ☆

That is, assuming the end result is successful. I'm afraid I don't have the resources to reward you on effort alone! Ah, and of course: serious inquires only, please.

Comments

[agradecido]

Really? [Fascinating. He hums.] Demons from my own world are particularly weak to the spirit school of magic--being a sort of spirit themselves, of course.

[He taps his chin.]

If there was a Templar awake, you could ask them, as well. I'm fairly sure their faith could do the trick. They use it mostly to nullify a mage's spellcasting, after all.

[He shrugs.]

It's worth a shot, perhaps, but don't hold me to it.

[cassus]

Two hundred sounds reasonable.

[ Now that they've gotten that out of the way- ]

This is a resident gone rogue, right?

I don't plan on turning up my nose on a good business proposition, but-

[ A demon running loose sounds like it needs more firepower to quell than even something that might boil at their touch. And yet there's no request for a cage or anyone to strong-arm said demonic individual.

That leaves a lot of questions unanswered. ]

How will you corner them long enough to put this miracle water to use?

[meinwaifu]

Ah, perhaps I should be a bit more clear! I'm not looking to exorcise the demon in question. But you see, he's among those who have developed some of the less manageable symptoms of this little plague going around. The holy water isn't so much for him as it is to clean up the mess he leaves every time he has an outburst.

[Though for the most part, Mephisto is doing well to hide any frustration he's been feeling as a result of all this, he still might sound a little put out about it. Which might just give away that this demon is someone he knows personally, and not just a problem he's had the misfortune of stumbling upon.]

But I'm afraid that's the extent of what I can say in so public a forum. Though he may be a demon, even he is owed the courtesy of his privacy.

[cassus]

It's big of you to clean up after them and pay others to help.

[ There is something pleasant about being in the company of someone who appears willing to go this far for the benefit of someone else. He might be nostalgic for that. ]

I understand. It sounds as though this is a friend of yours.

[ Sure he's slightly deviating from the business bit of this discussion. But now that he's short one of those, the topic feels more easily addressed. ]

Aren't you worried about him being a danger to himself. Or others?

[ Dazai doesn't know what it takes to heal a demon. Or restrain one. Though hopefully this fellow does, for everyone's sake. ]

[baguablade]

I can get you the holy water, but exactly what sort of demon problem are you dealing with?

[ It's always best to scout out the terrain ahead before charging into battle, of course. Should he be bringing just himself, or a small army along with the holy water? Is it possession, or a more physical sort of demonic trouble? Really, these are important things to know! ]

[meinwaifu]

[The spirit school of magic, huh... well, different worlds, after all.]

Well, if you'd like to give it a try simply for the sake of experimentation, then by all means-- I'd be happy to teach you the methods I know for preparing it.

[Says the guy who said he was asking for "serious inquiries only"--]

Shall we arrange for a time and place to meet?

1/2

[meinwaifu]

[...gross, is that really how this looks to other people??]

[Well, maybe he can find comfort in the fact that if Rin were to see this, he'd probably find it just as disgusting. "Friend"... ugh. It's not like he cares or anything!! B-Baka...]

[meinwaifu]

My, am I really so transparent? And here I was so hoping to keep that a secret... but yes, he's a very dear acquaintance of mine.

[He's so glad this is audio only, cause he sure can't say that with a straight face.]

Naturally, his health is my first priority -- but I wouldn't be seeking outside help like this if it weren't for a very good reason. And though I'm more than capable of restraining him myself should the need arise, his abilities are still rather destructive if left unchecked.

He's something of a fire demon, after all.

[meinwaifu]

[Ooh, an immediate offer! That's a good sign. Maybe this guy can actually offer something strong enough to be of use.]

Oh, a very powerful one -- but seeing as there seems to be something of a misconception going around, I feel I should clarify that I don't have any immediate need for assistance with the demon himself.

He's an acquaintance of mine, and is also among those afflicted with the disease. The holy water isn't for dealing with him, so much as it is for cleaning up whatever "mess" he might leave behind due to his hallucinations.

[baguablade]

Er. You're... acquainted with a demon? [ Wait, that's not the most surprising part of this news. ] Is he... a friendly demon or something?

[ Cain's a little skeptical — doesn't the name demon imply not so friendly? But he reminds himself, new world, things are probably different in other places, maybe demons from the other destroyed worlds can be friendly? ]

audio | un: EUSFORD

[eusford]

You know holy water is just water that someone talks over, right?

[ Of course he's leaving out very important pieces such as it needing to be by a priest but... in his perspective it's all done by people in fancier robes. ]

[cassus]

Demons aren't exactly commonplace in my world. [ Dazai spins a pencil between his fingers, lost in thought. ]

Not the literal variety, anyway.

[ He's been called as much more times than he can count. But that doesn't make him any less human. Or, well - mortal at least. Humanity, in the moral sense, can be a very relative thing. ]

So your friend is fortunate to have met someone familiar with their powers and skilled in how to handle them.

[ He's seen people team up this way after meeting here, but the phrasing suggests their history goes farther back than recent events. And since both the small talk and the subject itself aren't things he can't shake a curiosity in, he pries a little more. ]

Or are you from the same world?

[panzersoldat]

[ Look, magic holy lakes are totally a thing! There are all sorts of stories that involve them. Sometimes ladies even appear to chuck swords at people. So it just stands to reason for Reinhardt that a holy lake is a possibility. ]

I will do my best to find you a priest then. Or something. It is my word of honor as a knight. I will aide you in your demon problem.

[ Note that he says try. Reinhardt tends to keep his promises, so he knows better than to swear he will actually find someone. He doesn't want to break a promise after all. A man is only as good as his word and all of that. ]

text; un: e

[saucius]

How can water be "holy"? And what difference does it make from regular water?

[meinwaifu]

Oh, it's much more than simply that!

But my, I'm surprised! How is it, of all the things I mentioned just now, holy water is the only thing you doubt the existence of?

[meinwaifu]

[...e? Just e? He didn't even think usernames could be that short!]

Holy water is actually something of a misnomer. Simply put, it is water that has been imbued with spiritual energy, often reflecting the intent of the one who created it. When prepared correctly, even just a fine mist of it would be enough to repel a demon, or even burn its flesh.

Historically speaking, the ones responsible for creating holy water were often religious leaders of some sort -- which led to it being referred to as "holy".

[meinwaifu]

Oh? Would you suddenly be disinclined to help if I were to say he wasn't?

[He has all the reasons in the world to be skeptical -- maybe not of Rin, but certainly of Mephisto if he knew he was a demon as well. Buuuut he's an asshole, so. He's gonna try and make him feel bad about it.]

It's rather rude to judge a man simply for what he is, you know. Considering just how many different sorts of people and worlds exist-- you should be more open-minded!

[#notalldemons]

[baguablade]

If he wasn't a friendly demon, I might reconsider how to handle things, yes.

[ His voice is dry. That's just common sense, he's not going to feel bad about dealing cautiously with a demon who wants to hurt people. Nice try, Nice Demon.

Still, he's not going right to any sort of lethal option. If this man wants to vouch for the demon, he'll give him the benefit of the doubt. ]

[saucius]

[ She's not big on sharing. ]

But if it reflects "intent", wouldn't it do different things depending on who made it? Maybe someone makes holy water that does nothing to these demons you speak of.

So it's just a name? And if you need a religious leader you might find that most of us can't really help you.

[meinwaifu]

My, such negativity! And what would you propose I do instead? Shall I sit and twiddle my thumbs while half the city burns to the ground?

I suppose that would make for an entertaining evening, but I think I'd rather exhaust whatever means I have at my disposal first.

[meinwaifu]

Well, I suppose he's in luck! If anything, he's far too friendly for his own good.

[The way he says it, you'd think it were a bad thing.]

But even if he weren't-- the holy water is for the sake of those whole might unintentionally be harmed or otherwise inconvenienced by his abilities. He's not quite in his right mind at the moment, after all -- which is a rather dangerous thing for a demon capable of producing large amounts of fire at will.

[baguablade]

I can understand the value of clean up.

[ Tone still dry. A demon "not quite in his right mind" isn't the most reassuring of things to hear, Cain's still going to help, he's practically incapable of not helping once he knows there's a problem, but no matter how this man acts, he's not going to be brushing off just how alarming this whole thing is starting to sound. ]

What kind of mess should I be expecting, then?

[ Tacit agreement to provide aid. But he at least wants to know what to expect. ]

[saucius]

If that's the best you can manage?

If the city doesn't burn I'll know you got things under control, then.

[meinwaifu]

[Unfortunately, he doesn't reply -- he doesn't have time to deal with needless antagonism... that's supposed to be his job!]

[saucius]

[ But how else is she supposed to offer her help if she doesn't annoy him first?

The answer might never come. ]