[video | un: TeaOnRice] TIGER MOM! pre-dated to 9-9

[gekkajuu]

[Well, here Atsushi is again. He didn't think he'd use the network so much, and he feels kind of bad for it, but... he has big news.]

It hatched...

[The camera finally focuses in the barely lit room, and this can be seen in the background, crawling out of the towel it had been carefully wrapped up in for warmth. Atsushi should really at least greet people, but... how can he possibly think of such things when he has a baby cub around?]

This is what came out of my egg... I still can't believe it. A tiger from an egg... and for me?!

[That's... honestly a little uncanny, considering his ability. But even if Atsushi doesn't understand why this happened exactly, he can't bring himself to care. The cub is just... so cute. And it's nothing scary or dangerous, like a spider or dragon! After ten days of fretting, that's a huge relief. All right, a tiger may still grow up to be dangerous... but Atsushi will teach it better!]

I can't decide what to name it. Does anyone have any suggestions? It's a boy, if that matters.

[Another squeak from the cub, and Atsushi gets up, moving toward it just before the feed cuts out.]

Yes, yes, I'll warm you some more milk.

Comments

[text] | un: null

[cassus]

Crabmaster Part Two, the Crabbening.

Crabmaster I and C.M. Origins were both tragically lost.
And by lost I mean savagely torn limb from limb and eaten.

[ Sorry. Were you wanting some actually useful suggestions on naming your beast-child that may or may not be the spawn of immaculate conception? ( The jury is still out on that, Atsushi. Face it. This is a weird place. ) That's really too bad, since Dazai is utterly useless. ]

...During dinner last week.
They were delicious.

[ He's still not being helpful. Or even remotely trying at all. If you need further proof- Exhibit A: ]

Or how about Paralithodes?
Thoddy or Thud for short, of course.

[ Finally, I get to use this. ]

[text] FLKHFLAHFKLHG quality art

[gekkajuu]

I'm not naming him after a food.

[... No, actually, he might. But not when it's so obviously done with such obvious lack of care. Love your grandson, dammit!!]

I was wondering if I should name it after someone from home, but there's only the people from the Agency, and that would be weird if they woke up.

text! un: romanée-conti

[vacuum]

[ A bigger man wouldn't butt into the conversation of their arch-nemesis just to start an argument. Chuuya isn't a bigger man. The moment he spots Dazai on the post, he responds to him almost immediately. ]

Back to your lame jokes again? Some things really don't change.

Tell me -- does anyone actually laugh at them? Ever?

text! un: null

[cassus]

[ 'A Bigger Man'. Chuuya, you're not even big, let alone bigger. No one expects much out of you, when it comes to height or maturity. ]

Actually, I remember a redheaded runt laughing at my jokes so hard soda came out of his nose.
I think it's your most photogenic picture to date!

[ It's one of the nicer recollections, free of bloodshed or betrayal, when they were both much younger and honest with themselves.

Good thing this isn't a video, because Dazai's expression doesn't reflect the playfully vicious demeanor he's trying to portray throughout this conversation. ]

It'd look spectacular, blown up and plastered around the city. Or better yet, on the network - so no one misses it.
Wouldn't you agree?

audio | un: saypeace

[b0mbshell]

A tiger? Came from that egg?

That little white tiger?

Tigers come from eggs here?

[He needs some recovery time, please bear with him. He's trying.]

audio

[gekkajuu]

[Don't worry, Atsushi is pretty much lost, himself. He's trying to focus on doing what needs to be done, in part just so he doesn't have to think about it too much.

But also because it feels pretty good to be entrusted with something this important... whoever dumped the egg with him.]

He did, yes!

Isn't it amazing?

Re: audio

[b0mbshell]

Yeah, it's real cute.

But uh...

What are you gonna feed it? What about when it needs more room?

[How do egg tigers even work?] Do these things happen regularly around here? That'd make it a lot easier on you if it did.

voice | username: No

[sullenstallion]

Holy shit!

[Dylas is yelling. Hopefully, the tiger isn't near the phone by now?]

You really did lay it! Why didn't you just tell me?!

voice

[gekkajuu]

[At least it's voice, but WOW, show some consideration for your not!son!! Also for your not!wife's eardrums.]

I didn't lay it! And please don't shout!

voice; yeah i'm going for it

[sullenstallion]

How did you even...how is that possible?

[He knows he got humped by this tiger once, but that was it, so he's not going to assume responsibility here. Yet. But. He's ignoring that protest and continuing with his thought process.]

Maybe some sort of...butt nugget? No, no, that'd be impossible...that's not how eggs work.

video!

[vacuum]

I don't blame that guy for thinking you laid it.

[ It's too much of a coincidence to be true. ]

[gekkajuu]

Anyone would understand that that's impossible.

[WHY YOU ALL GOTTA MPREG HIM?!]

video | Heckling Chuuya - is this even possible?

[cassus]

Ah, so you have experience in this?

[ Dazai gives a thoughtful hum. ]

Chuuya, can you keep your weird fetishes to yourself?

No one wants to hear about your hobby of pushing out butterball-sized omelets until your nether-regions are absolutely obliterated.

[ Now there's a visual. Listen. If it's good for the goose, it's good for the gander. So he's going to harass you right back. ]

You should probably look into hemorrhoid creme for that.

video — un: direwolf

[northborn]

[ A young man in furs hastily engages the video feed, eyes wide with wonder. ]

I've never seen such a creature... [ No tigers to speak of in Westeros, at least not to his knowledge! ] ...what— what is he?

video

[gekkajuu]

[Somehow, the possibility that people may not know tigers hadn't yet occurred to Atsushi - several refugees are familiar with them, he knows - but it shouldn't really be a surprise. Anyway, he's happy to explain.]

He's a tiger! Where I'm from, that's the biggest of the big cat species. Most of them are orange under their stripes, but some rare specimens are white, or close enough to it.

[Holding the cub, which is all wrapped up in a towel again, Atsushi gently scritches its head; one of its ears twitches.]

video, un: ironborn

[reek]

Congratulations. You haven't killed it after all.

[ He smirks coolly, but eyes the creature with a hint of uncertainty and curiosity. He has no idea what this creature is either. ]

What is it?

video

[gekkajuu]

Believe me, it's something of a surprise to me, too.

[But his smile is bright, just a little proud of himself. He managed a thing!]

It's a white tiger. They're the biggest cat species, where I'm from.

audio - un: star-lord

[volumeone]

That is both adorable and badass. You seriously got a pet tiger?

audio

[gekkajuu]

I'm not sure..? The egg just showed up next to my bed, and eventually a tiger hatched from it... Why the egg was left with me, I can only guess.

But at least it hatched! And it seems healthy.

video | un: zevran

[agradecido]

[Give him a minute to stare, sorry.]

Never in my life would I have thought to see a cat born of an egg. Still, congratulations are due. Felicitations then, on the occasion of this....

[Blink blink.]

Birth?

video

[gekkajuu]

Thank you. It's definitely not how cats were born in my world, either, but...

[With the cub wrapped up and in his lap, he carefully pets its forehead.]

... it's still a miracle. I'm so glad that he hatched, and that he's healthy.

voice; un: theEND

[winddaughter]

Wow, that's so cute!!

[definitely no help though]

voice

[gekkajuu]

Isn't it just~?

It will be a lot of work taking care of him, but I'm so glad that he's alive and healthy... and just looking at him, I feel capable of doing whatever it will take.

un: ana

[nanamari]

Congratulations on becoming a new mom.

[gekkajuu]

[He should argue with that, but... instead he just gives up.]

Thank you.