video; un: ROCKET | happiness is a warm gun

[beatupgrass]

[Here we have Rocket, our local raccoonoid, contributing his part of the planning.]

So I don't know shit about dragons, but I do know a few things about fightin' giant monsters, and I want these dudes to fail so bad in their stupid plan that they die humiliated. That would give me an extreme amount of satisfaction. So! I got a proposal.

See, everybody's got their little contributions to this cause, and this is mine- I build things. Specifically, I build gadgets. Tech, weapons, bombs... Mostly those last two. The problem is that unless y'all want me to start ripping non-essentials off the station while those Natha jerks are off on vacation or whatever, I don't have the materials to arm everybody who wants it.

Ergo if you want bigger and badder weapons, you need to come to Wyver and bring me whatever you got that I can make something worth your while with. We'll discuss the payment particulars later.

Comments

[impavid]

[ ... Ah. You're -- yes, he knows your type. ]

Curiosity is a powerful thing.

[ As is being an adrenaline junkie. He would know.

Anyway, please imagine that the IMAGE.JPG he attaches here is him holding this gun not it floating in green render space.

This thing is called a Particle Magnum by the way because Lol Stargate. ]

I'm not even going to try and guess how they did it but it sticks just enough to make me nervous it might eventually blow my hand off at the wrong moment.

[beatupgrass]

Oh man, that is nice. And that's a lot of power for a handgun. When you described it, I thought it was gonna be a frickin' cannon.

[via text no can see you drool.]

[impavid]

[ Okay but you can't keep it, Rocket. ]

Hence my desire to fix it so I can aim it at a dragon's head.

[beatupgrass]

[rude.]

Well, you're asking the right guy. Any other moron here's liable to get their face melted off.

[impavid]

[ This list of morons includes John, who did spend a heart-stopping few seconds fiddling before he realised he had no idea what he was doing and also that it was a very bad idea. ]

I'm glad to hear it, you've come highly reccomended.

[ A partial lie but who's counting, flattery sometimes gets you discounts. ]

I don't have much in the way of relevant gun parts but I have one piece of a push to talk radio set I can give up as payment. I have nobody to talk to with it right now it may as well be recycled for the greater good.

[beatupgrass]

You have yet to begin seeing what I can make outta basically nothing. Quill has a lot of junk on his ship that's been re-purposed.

[So proud of himself.]

Incidentally, though, who was your reference? I wanna know who I gotta thank for spreading the good word that is me.

[impavid]

I think they'd prefer to stay anonymous. You know, wouldn't want to embarrass them or anything.

[ Also he strongly suspects Jessica would just be angry. ]

So, think you can take a look next time I'm in your area? I'm out in Khalo right now.

[beatupgrass]

Yeah, I bet. [That... doesn't narrow it down any. It just eliminates Prompto, Mantis, and Gamora. Oh well.]

Sure thing, man. Door's open... 'Cause we apparently have a door. Those sky mansions are way more complicated than they look.

[impavid]

[ Okay, but -- ]

Are doors not normal where you're from?

[ ... Actually, a raccoon, so. Huh. It's true raccoons don't use doors. Maybe that's it? ]

[beatupgrass]

No... we just have aero-rigs so we fly up through the balcony and never use the door.

[impavid]

Your balcony doesn't have a door either?

[ I mean sure, it'd require getting up there but, isn't that a security hazard... ]

[beatupgrass]

It's open air and leads straight into the mansion. Do you want weapons or do you wanna talk architecture?